Christian Dating Advice For Men

Author: Joseph Matthews
Website: www.artofapproaching.com

If there was ever a balancing act in our lives, it’s the one in which we have to balance our desires, and our beliefs.

We all struggle as men with our faith and urges; however, we can learn how to fit these two qualities together, by learning new perspectives.

It is natural to strive to stand firm in what we believe and for most Christian men, staying within the boundaries of the church is essential for their experience of love.

One of those boundaries is that sex should only happen once married.

I don’t judge this tenant. Some people choose to follow it. I believe this is just as valid as the people who choose not to follow it.

Ancient philosophy informs us that partaking of sex with one another mingles a piece of our soul with the other and then continues with us forever.

Keeping your virginity for your wife is a wise choice since this is true in some respects.

This can present a challenge for men who strive to remain strong in their faith.

How do continue to attract a woman and foster a relationship if you have to wait until marriage to consummate it?

Sex is important after all, since marriage to someone sexually incompatible is a difficult union for anyone.

Here is some advice I’ve come up with specifically for men who face this issue of romance vs. faith.

1. Be clear about what you believe.

Faith guides us throughout our lifetime, is essential that you are clear in where you place your faith and beliefs.

God gave us free will and the ability to think and reason. It is up to us to look at all our options and decide what path to take. You may believe in some of what the Church teaches, but not all. Or, you may embrace all of the Church’s teachings.

Your choice is your own; however, you must be clear of your belief and stand strong.

2. Understand that God has a plan for you.

Keep your faith in knowing God has a plan to unite you and the woman who is meant for you.

Keep in mind, you have to do your part too, since there is only so much that he can do. You have free will and must take action to capture the opportunities presented to you.

To find the right woman for you, you must be proactive.

Since your actions are belief based on the path God that has set before you, you have to make it happen. This means going out to meet women, dating and getting to know the woman. Remember this is not something that just happens.

3. Understand that virginity is not mysterious or essential.

Sex is simply an act, whether virginity is in question or not. It comes naturally as does walking, talking and breathing. We do these things.

Gods intention is for man to be fruitful and multiply, this means sex. It is one of the greatest gifts from God; his intention is for us to have sex, this is why sex is pleasurable.

So to look at your virginity as something sacred is not helpful. Virginity is meant to be lost – the real challenge is finding the right person to lose it to!

In the end, there is a spiritual aspect to sex. It’s the aspect that you find someone who makes you feel whole, alive, and loved. This is something separate from the act of sex, because this touches you on a deeper level.

It is this type of intimacy you should strive to achieve before marriage, because this will help you to know if the physical aspect will be in tune as well.

Do not be afraid to be intimate with women! Kissing, hugging, touching – this is all fine. But sharing your hopes and dreams, staring deep into her eyes and feeling her inner-most desires… that is where true intimacy stems from.

4. Look at women as real people, and do not put them on a pedestal.

You might be tempted to place a woman on a pedestal when your faith places sex as so important.

Perhaps you consider her a goddess, a delicate flower, something you should cherish and treat special.

But women are no different from me. God cut us both from the same cloth. To treat a woman as though she is special, just because you are sexually attracted to her, is not the same as respecting her.

Loving an ideal is easy, although it is difficult at times to love reality. Remember women too get cranky when hungry, awakens with morning breath and asks you to take out the garbage. This is reality.

We have to learn to love the reality of women, and not idealize them. Realize that sex is just one aspect to the females of our species. And that being human, we all share similar traits.

Understanding that women as people are just like men, this enables us to gain a better perspective of whether we are meant to share our lives with them.

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